I Don't Know ??

This was with which I started writing, I was 14 then... full of questions, confusions, dreams.... n so much... time answered some of them.. n some... still left..:)

What I am I don't know

A dying star or the sun that brightly glows
A still pond or the river that always flows
Am I a living dead or just a machine
Or I am a strange object that noone could imagine

There is no enemy of mine but I have no friend
Am I useful for others or just a barren land
Am I a puzzle for others or an understanding object
Do I know what are my wishes and what is my subject

Am I a garland of flowers or a bunch of thorns
Or I am like a rose with a sweet smell as well as thorns
I don't know whether I am lucky or unlucky for others
Whether they also consider luck or about this they don't bother

I don't know others take me lightly or seriously
I also don't know whether I am beautiful or ugly
I don't know whether I am an object to be mocked at
Or I am a being that should be responded

I love others but I don't know whether they love me
They favour me or just criticise me
Whether they compare me with a hawk or a cuckoo
Or they just use me as a clue
I don't know whom I love loves me or not
whether I shall have a clear life or life with some spot

When I will grow what will I do
Would I just be married like other girls
Or I shall have the Right to do what I wish to do
Shall I spend all my life working for others
Or to do my work I would have to seek others

Would I have such a long life to become old
Would then I will have a past shining like gold
When I shall die I don't know
I would be burnt, buried
Or my body would be thrown as a garbage

If all this I don't know then what do I know
I am just aware of this fact of my life
That I shall work and work always
Till I am Alive !!
Till... I am Alive !!